http://i64.tinypic.com/2960zyw.jpg

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amandla appreciation life

Sh'eenaz

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A name shamelessly lifted off of The Witcher Wikia

After everything that's happened, it's like Rain can barely remember life before 24/7. Rain grew up with two siblings, a brother and a sister. She was the eldest and they came from a modest background, their parents provided everything they could want. Her grandparents lived in the same house so that when her parents were off to work, there was someone to stay home to care for them. Rain was your typical child in every way, especially when it came to music and dance. She loved singing and dancing along with her favorite groups and idols on screen. She would sing along to theme songs during the credits of the K-dramas her grandparents would watch at home. She would dance along while doing chores. She always liked it and never thought she would be doing that as a career. It happened because her grandmother's friend was talking about her son's talent agency. They wanted something new and fresh for the music scene, something that went along with tradition but provided an extra edge. Her grandmother was half listening but what she heard was young, fresh and talented. She thought "oh that's my Rain" and offered to have her sing for her friend's son. In order to indulge Rain's grandmother, Rain went along with it thinking it was some sort of fluke and she'd fail then go about her life as usual. She sang for the agency and all of sudden everything went silent. In a matter of days, a contract was drawn up and Rain was the first member of a new girl group called 24/7. The concept of 24/7 would have likely thrown Rain off but all she saw was dollar signs to help her family and a chance to do what she loved. What she didn't know was how obsessive she would need to become. She had no idea how both her body and mind would need to be rewired solely for this endeavor of being popular in her native country. She was already thin but she was put on a strict protein rich diet to increase her muscle tone, she was sent to the gym, she was trained as a dancer. The dancing part was likely the hardest because she used to find dancing fun then she had to learn the basic form, posture, and everything else before she got to the exciting parts. It was grueling for a girl who had no prior knowledge of what it took to look like her favorite idols. She did it though without complaint, she attended her early morning singing lessons to broaden her range. She ate only what she was allowed, she was created social media accounts which she was expected update frequently. When she missed any postings, she was given less free time to do as she wished. She was always allowed to see family, that time was never taken from her but it was very strict. Her conversations were monitored so she couldn't say she was unhappy about the rigorous training. She amassed a great following even though her girl group was incomplete. She was started to get followed on the streets and photos taken. Rain plastered a smile on her face and engaged in every fan's whim. When other girls were added, Rain was relieved to see some other people who could become friends with her. So far all of Rain's former friends in school had gone on and she hadn't kept any. So Rain relief heavily on her group mates. The training was hardest on them because they were expected to learn even faster than Rain. When the members were all found and they started recording and touring, it was a huge shock for her and the girls. All the rehearsals, long hours in makeup and wardrobe on top of keeping up with the usual routine of fitness, diet, and the lot. It was taking its toll but Rain kept a smile on and kept posting, she kept recording videos, and replying to fans. This what she was trained to do. She started to believe she was this image of herself, not giving herself a chance to explore who she really is. Rain became close to Sun-hee during the tour and in the process got to know her brother, Ha-joon. This is her first friend outside the group in ages and they bonded over their love of animals, one of the few traits that was still authentically hers from childhood. Right now, that is her only solace as she tries to keep smiling and performing every single moment of every day as a member of 24/7.

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finally finished rain!

Nam Joo Hyuk

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May consider using him for a character in Seoul

Yeah just checked and it did. Says today ia estimated arrival but doubt it cause last scan was this am....in KY. Lol

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my copying and pasting a message about stephen's apple watch, irene got it for him as a gift and to avoid tax shite. woot woot!

Cameron hated going to the therapist sometimes. Some days she was super helpful but other days Cammy just wanted to punch her in the face. And today was one of those punch everyone in the face kind of days. Most of the time she was not a violent person and she certainly did not think of being violent often, but sometimes Cammy just got into these sort of moods and the only one who could pull her back was her brother Morgan. It was like she was Dr. Jekyll and had an inner Mr. Hyde and she could switch with a single snap. Having bipolar depression was something that she often times wished she could wish away, but it was a part of her and she had to deal with it. It scared her to hear people tell her what she did and said when she was in one of her "moments" cause she normally would have never known she had one unless someone told her. That was the scariest part, being so unaware of what she was doing.

Finally her session was over and Cammy could retreat back to her apartment which she shared with her brother. Morgan was at work and she had not bothered to ask him when he was gonna be home so she was unsure on when to expect him home. She made a quick stop at the store and jut walking through the aisles to grab some junk food made her irritable. She needed to get out of there as soon as possible so she could feel secure in her own home with her junk food and joint. Cammy just wanted to be so high she didn't care about how many calories she was about to scarf down. That was something else Cammy hated about her own self - how she was always counting calories and worried about how fat she was becoming. She was doing so well, until she suddenly no longer was okay.

Having bipolar depression was one bad thing against her, and her anorexia was second to that. Cammy was so fucked up and she often asked out loud what she did to be stricken with such terrible things. She just wanted to be normal. But what was normal? She surely did not know, but anything but her life was normal. Ever since she got out of the hospital for malnutrition she felt weird, like she did not know what to do with herself. She went from not eating anything but almonds and water, to stuffing her mouth with chips and candy. There was no one or the other. Either she did not eat, or she ate everything. And yet neither of those options made her feel alive, or human. She felt like a robot, going through the motions to try and fit in with humans. She really wanted to be better right now, but that was always such a short and twisted road. Cammy was exhausted and it showed.

Finally getting home, Cammy changed and set up her display of food before starting up the tv and settling on whatever happened to be on at the moment, which was mostly shopping channels and indie flicks. Soon she was gonna be too high to know what was going on so she turned to a home design show and lit up a joint. The sweet smell of marijuana filled her body and she finally felt like she could relax. Cammy was not having a good day, but this joint was gonna change it all. At least for today, and then she would have to start all over again tomorrow.

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a post?!

first you say you love me, then you say you don't


^^ moving stuff in my sig

https://i.pinimg.com/originals/ff/69...7a88d26ae6.gif

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showing Belle something via Discord

"Oh come on, you're literally a Disney prince! Isn't that secretly every young gay boy's dream? My favorites were always Aladdin and Prince Eric. Something about that dark hair and those deep brown eyes..." He sighed dreamily, aware that he was describing two-dimensional animated characters that didn't really have any depth to their eyes at all, but a boy could still imagine. "You're hot. Deal with it, own it, use it. And if you want someone to help him see what he's missing if he doesn't go for you, I volunteer," he raised his hand for emphasis, a big grin on his face. True he was crushing on Alexandra, but he hadn't lied about crushing on Leo too, just a little bit less. Even so, if he got the chance to make out with Leo he'd totally take it, even if it was just to get some other guy to open his eyes and see that Leo was someone worth betting on.

Leo still looked uncomfortable, rubbing the back of his neck like that, and Jeremy would've taken it upon himself to spend some time drilling it into his head that he shouldn't put himself down and convince him of how great he really was and how lucky this guy Lowell should be that Leo was interested in him. But then Leo suddenly changed the subject and brought up Stephen, and suddenly it was like Jeremy just deflated, his smile melting away. "You know about Stephen...?" He swallowed. "Who told you? Does Alexandra know? I haven't told her. If she knows and she heard it from someone else she's gonna be so pissed at me." This time it was Jeremy's turn to look uncertain, his turn to rub the back of his neck.

He wasn't prepared to talk about Stephen or the possibilities of what might happen to him, but most of all he hadn't wanted to tell Alexandra because he didn't want to make her sad. She'd lost siblings to cancer, and talking about the possibility that Stephen might... that he was sick, would force her to be there for Jeremy because they were best friends and that's what best friends did, but he didn't want to put her through reliving those memories.


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Posting for Tom and being paranoid about losing posts when I type them in the browser so I always copy them first.

https://www.chicagotribune.com/subur...erm-story.html

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a violent incident in a suburb nearby sigh